


I Volunteered for This

by xbld15



Category: Stargate - All Series, Stargate SG-1
Genre: But not necessarily a Rom/Com, Comedic Elements, Explicit Language, M/M, Mutual Pining, Off-World, Off-World Scenario, Pining, Pyramid, Romance, Stargate, Tok'ra, hosts
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-01-04
Updated: 2016-11-09
Packaged: 2018-05-11 19:57:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5640040
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xbld15/pseuds/xbld15
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oliver is a new recruit to the Tok'ra, having joined a new exchange program where members of the Tau'ri meld with Tok'ra in order to "further Tau'ri-Tok'ra relations". </p><p>Oliver is sent off-world to a Tok'ra research facility where he must deal with having another person in his head and his constant manipulations to get him and Jared (another human of the same program) together.</p><p>Set in the general Stargate universe, in time with modern happenings.</p><p>Rated M for language.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mantra

_I volunteered for this,_ Oliver thinks to himself.

_-Yes, you did._

_O, shut up. You’re not helping._

_-Just talk to him._

_Easy for you to say. As a fuckin’ Tok’ra._

_-I could do it for you._

“No!” Oliver audibly shouts. The other inhabitants of the pyramid turn to look at him from their various workstations in annoyance.

“Sorry,” Oliver says sheepishly. The others return to their research mumbling, “new recruit,” under their breaths.

Oliver often forgets that he’s talking to Mashak—his Tok’ra—in his head, and occasionally finds himself talking to himself out-loud. Much to the annoyance of the older Tok’ra, who had grown quite used to the same faces for centuries, and are having some difficulty adjusting to having newer Tok’ra around. Especially when they have to go through adjusting to another mind within themselves, not remembering when they themselves experienced much of the same.

 _I volunteered for this,_ Oliver tells himself again.

The phrase has become his mantra ever since accepting the implantation of Mashak. He’d say it when whenever Mashak takes over his body, or whenever they got into firefights with the Lucian Alliance.

More recently, he’s started saying it whenever he "accidentally" runs into Jared: a certain tall, blonde, around-Oliver’s-age, dreamy guy that Oliver just "happens" to run into all-the-time.

He’s pretty sure that these "accidental" and "random" encounters are Mashak’s doing. Of course Mashak denies it, but Oliver’s adamant he’s behind it. Him _and_ Ferran—Jared’s Tok’ra.

Upon implantation, Oliver had failed to realize that Mashak would learn _all_ of his deep dark secrets, including one he’d hidden away for a _long_ time. Oliver had heard stories of those who had come out in the military and had gotten harassed for it, even after the repeal of DADT, and Oliver wasn’t about to go through the same thing.

Hiding it had been easy, mainly because he was already hiding it before he joined the military, but all that went out the window the instant Mashak melded with him. Oliver begged Mashak not to say anything, and thankfully, Mashak agreed, having had access to Oliver’s memories and knowing how much it meant to him to keep it a secret. But that didn’t stop Mashak from bringing it up all-the-time.

Oliver’s mind once again drifts towards Jared, no doubt caused by Mashak, and chances a look over at Jared’s station, located conveniently two stations up and one over to the right, giving Oliver a fine view of Jared’s back and his, assets.

_-Talk. To. Him._

Mashak likes to constantly remind Oliver that, “we’re not earth anymore” and “Tok’ra don’t have genders, and therefore don’t feel any societal pressure about those they find attractive.” But Oliver still has his doubts, as well as years of mental suppression that keep him from doing anything with his new found freedom from “societal pressures”.

 _Why do you care so much anyway?_ Oliver thinks, quickly looking away from Jared.

 _-Well, for one, it’s hard to work, let alone_ think _under these_ conditions _._

_Conditions?_

_-You! And your trepidation about what other’s think about you._

_You really don’t know that much about humans, do you?_

_-Well, no, but—_

“We’re not on earth anymore,” Oliver says sarcastically, out-loud. Everyone turns to him again, looking a little more pissed this time. Only this time, Jared turns around to look at Oliver, an amused smile on his lips. Oliver freezes as he makes eye contact with Jared, and attempts a smile, but instead, lets out a whimper and his mouth twists into something resembling a smile.

_-Smooth._

_Shut up,_ Oliver thinks, breaking eye contact with Jared, who is looking a little confused.

 _I volunteered for this,_ Oliver repeats his mantra.

_-You keep on saying that phrase, but I don’t think it means what you think it means._

_Someone’s been watching_ The Princess Bride, Oliver quips back, _and I know exactly what it means._

_-Oh really._

_Yes._

_-What does it mean, then?_

“It means that I volunteered to have you in my head all the time messing with my business!” Oliver shouts out-loud to the entire room.

Several Tok’ra drop their various instruments they were holding, and Oliver hears glass shatter on the floor, as well as a string of curses echo throughout the pyramid.

Oliver winces, and waits for one of the other Tok’ra to come over and chastise him. He ducks his head and tries to look innocent.

“Oliver?” a voice says directly in front of Oliver’s workstation.

The voice isn’t angry, so Oliver chances a look up and comes face-to-face with Jared, looking both concerned and confused. Oliver locks eyes with Jared and freezes like a deer in headlights.

Jared has sandy blonde hair, neat eyebrows, pale skin, tanned from the heat of the planet they’re on, and full pink lips. He’s easily six-feet tall, towering over Oliver, who is only five-eight—on a good day. Jared is well built and Oliver can see the outlines on his muscled chest and arms through the standard Tok’ra garb, the material slightly too small for Jared’s form—Oliver’s not complaining though.

Oliver swears he looks exactly like Captain America.

_Maybe I can be his Winter Soldier—_

“Are you alright?” Jared asks, breaking Oliver out of his thoughts.

Oliver doesn’t say anything, but nods slowly, still staring at Jared.

“You’re from earth too?” Jared continues.

Oliver nods again, still too shocked to say anything.

“Me too,” Jared says, “I was recruited a year ago.”

“I’m new.” Oliver says shyly, voice a little higher than he’d like.

 “Yeah, I could tell,” Jared says, smirking. Oliver melts, and lets out a barely audible whine.

 _-Get a grip on yourself,_ Mashak says.

“So, would you like to get lunch sometime?” Jared says after a short while of Oliver _still_ staring and not saying anything.

“I’ve never met anyone from earth here that also has a Tok’ra in them. We could compare notes,” Jared concludes the offer, with a wide expectant smile.

Oliver doesn’t say anything, at a lost for words at Jared’s proposal

 _This can’t be happening,_ Oliver thinks.

 _O, for the love of—,_ Oliver’s head dips down and then back up.

“He would love to,” Mashak says in his deeper Tok’ra voice, as he takes over, Oliver technically absent.

“Great!” Jared says, smiling even wider, not concerned what-so-ever that Mashak answered for Oliver.

“How about noon tomorrow?” Jared says, beaming like he just won the lottery.

“Sure,” Mashak says, confirming for Oliver, “You can meet him here at his workstation.”

“I’ll do just that,” Jared says, still beaming, and then turns and walks back to his station.

 _I fucking hate you,_ Oliver thinks to Mashak, now able to think clearly that Jared’s gone.

 _-You’ll thank me later,_ Mashak responds, _now, can I remain in control so we can get some work done?_

 _Fine,_ Oliver concedes, silently thankful to Mashak for saving his ass, in the far corner in his mind he still has to himself, and spends the rest of the time Mashak is control psyching himself up for tomorrow.

+++


	2. The Next Morning

The next day, Oliver looks at himself in the mirror after his morning shower—or the Tok’ra equivalent of a fine mist laced with cleaning chemicals blasted all over his body.

A young, twenty-three-year-old, dark-brown haired man with naturally tanned skin stares back at him. He has thick messy hair forced to one side, with matching eyebrows. His eyes are a deep shade of chocolate-brown. His thin mouth is drawn tight, examining his appearance.

_-I think you look fine._

“Of course you do. You have to live with this face too.” Oliver says out-loud.

It helps Oliver to physically talk to Mashak, at least while he's alone. It helps him to choose what he says, as opposed to talking to a voice inside his head, while he himself is inside his head, thinking, literally, whatever's on his mind.

_-Why do you do that?_

“What?”

_-Put yourself down constantly._

“Shouldn’t you know? You're in _my_ head.”

_-Contrary to what you might think, I still respect your privacy. Plus, I think it’s helpful for you to talk to_ someone _about_ certain things _. And it might as well be me._

“Certain things?”

_-Things about yourself that you don’t feel comfortable with. Things that the Tok’ra don’t see the same way as they do on earth._

“Come on Mashak, we’ve talked about this.”

_-Yes, we have. And I realize your journey has been a long one—_

“That’s an understatement”

_-Yes, but now that you are among the Tok’ra, things are different. People are different. You can be whoever you want to be with us._

“Yes, I know. The Tok’ra are a tight bunch, aren’t they? But, I still feel attached to earth. To my family. I can’t imagine what they’d think. I don’t want to lose them.”

_-I understand, but just know that you are a Tok’ra now, and we are your family too. We can’t afford to hate our own. We will always accept you._

“Mashak, have you finished your report on the ZPM analysis?” A senior Tok’ra asks from the door-less entrance to Oliver and Mashak’s quarters, interrupting their discussion.

Oliver dips his head down, allowing Mashak to take control.

“Yes, Darach, I have the report at my workstation. I can give to you there,” Mashak responds, turning towards Darach.

“Good. Thank you, Mashak. How is our new recruit doing?”

“Oliver is doing well. He is adjusting, and has found a friend from earth.”

_Hey!_ Oliver interjects

“Great,” Darach says, and then takes his leave.

_What was that!? Why did you tell him about Jared!?_

“There are no secrets among the Tok’ra, and honesty is always the best approach.”

_Right, sorry. I was back home there for a second._

“No worries, I should have told you sooner.”

_I’ll get it eventually._

Mashak remains in control while they get ready to head to their workstation, forming a comfortable silence.

“There is another matter, Oliver,” Mashak says, as he stands in front of the mirror, tone turning serious.

_What is it?_

“Yesterday when you were talking to Jared, I took over.”

_Oh, yeah, thanks for that, you really saved my pride there._

“No, I took over without your permission. It was wrong. I am not a Goa’uld.”

_No of course you aren’t, Mashak. I know that,_ Oliver’s well aware how much the Tok’ra despise everything the Goa’uld did.

“I don’t know why I did it, I have been a Tok’ra for many years and have never done such a thing.”

_Well, you’ve never been with an earthling. We’re different. More confident and demanding. I must be rubbing off on you,_ Oliver adds a teasing inflection, hoping to ease Mashak’s discomfort.

“Yes, that could be it…” Mashak trails off, not fully convinced.

_Hey, we’ll work on it. We’re in this together, right?_

“Right.”

Mashak gives an almost genuine smile to the mirror in front of him, and then run his hand through Oliver’s hair and straightens the standard Tok’ra garb, smoothing the fabric.

“I wish they’d give us something else to wear,” Mashak says, examining his and Oliver’s appearance.

_Mashak, are_ you _nervous about lunch with Jared?_

“Only a little,” Mashak responds, “Like you said, some of you is rubbing off on me. Normally, I can handle just about anything.”

_Aww, Mashak._

“Regardless, I believe you should be in control for it. But, until then, I ask that I remain so we can get some work done today.”

_Are you sure, Mashak? You are_ a little _nervous,_ Oliver adds in his most teasing tone.

Mashak sighs, “Yes. I am still a Tok’ra, and can act professionally.”

_Alright, that seems fair,_ Oliver concedes, aware that Mashak might not be used to earth humor and teasing, not wanting to go too far.

“Thank you, Oliver.”

+++

Mashak and Oliver make their way to their workstation, navigating their way through the pyramid.

Mashak, having lived through the Goa’uld oppression, was used to living in tunnels, and was glad that they now could live above ground and no longer in fear. Sure, there were still worlds who had never heard of the Tok’ra and automatically assume they are Goa’uld, but the Tok’ra council is actively working to improve that.

Some simple talks are held on the more hostile worlds (in neutral locations of course), and on other worlds who are more open minded, the same program that brought Oliver and Jared here is being introduced. All in all, the Tok’ra have never been healthier, and that brings Mashak great joy.

They are about to enter the hall when Jared appears next to Oliver and Mashak, only, Ferran is control and greets them, “Good morning, Mashak.”

The Tok’ra have a creepy way of always knowing who in control of the host body, Oliver finds. He hasn’t quite mastered the art and has called many Tok’ra the wrong person on many occasions.

“Good morning, Ferran,” Mashak greets back. Their friendly greetings all but confirm Oliver’s suspicions that they are working together, and Oliver wonders if Jared is in on it too.

Oliver’s naturally paranoid, mainly that his secret will be discovered. He’d gone to many lengths, including secluding himself from other people to avoid temptation. The result has left him suspicious of practically everyone.

He’s not sure why he joined the military. Part of him thinks that it will help him get out of his shell, but boot camp proved to be tough, but not for the physicality of it all. Oliver’s a natural runner, gifted from his Native ancestors, and always had more stamina and endurance that most people. What was difficult was the communal nature of boot camp.

Dressing and showering in front of others was never something Oliver did. Not that he was ashamed of his body. Being a runner meant he had a naturally lean physique, and weight training helped him develop his upper body more.

The problem was being around so many naked men. For anyone else, that might be the best thing in the world! But, for Oliver, he was constantly paranoid he’d pop a boner, the others would notice, and he’d get the beating of his life. Not that it ever happened to anyone, but Oliver’s paranoid shelf didn’t care.

So, why the Tok’ra, right? Well, while the military wasn’t the solution to Oliver’s seclusion issues, he figured having another person he _has_ to talk to and live with twenty-four-seven inside his head would be a trial by fire, and would surely cure him.

What Oliver didn’t expect was for Mashak to be _too_ accepting. Oliver wanted Mashak to be a little thrown off, but Mashak treated his seclusion issues and his secret like they didn’t matter, which kinda made Oliver feel like his struggle didn’t mean anything.

He doesn’t know how to say this to Mashak. Everything Mashak has said leads Oliver to assume he wouldn’t understand, which is why Oliver tends to change the subject whenever Mashak tries to figure out why Oliver acts the way he does. Oliver knows this is a bad mentality to have, but it’s easier to just avoid confrontation sometimes.

“Ready to get some work done today?” Ferran asks. The phrase is so human that Oliver can tell Jared has been rubbing off on Ferran as well.

“Naturally,” Mashak replies.

Oliver can feel the slightest smirk tug at his lips, and can see the evidence of the same on Jared’s features.

_Aha! Got you now!_ Oliver says, in the dark corner of his mind.

Jared and Ferran leave towards the front of the room, while Oliver and Mashak head for their workstation.

Mashak then lugs out the ZPM they’ve been studying, trying to see if they can get the thing to recharge, and hooks up various wires and nodes to it. Darach comes by to pick up the report they had completed yesterday about their attempts to run different types of charges through the ZPM. Oliver was in control and had almost electrocuted himself twice and nearly dropped the ZPM. It was a miracle they got the report done at all.

Eventually, the room grows quiet as everyone starts working and fiddling with various gadgets, and Mashak falls into his own rhythm, Oliver watching, trying not to be bored.

_You’d tell me if you were scheming anything, right?_ Oliver says after a while. He couldn’t get Mashak and Ferran’s smirks out of his head.

_-That would defeat the purpose of the scheme._

_Only if it was me you were scheming against._

_-True. Do you have a point?_

_I’ll rephrase: are you scheming against me to get me to get together with Jared?_

_-And if I am?_

_Hey, don’t hide behind hypotheticals, buddy!_

_-I think you’re just being paranoid. Besides, I think you two would make a great paring._

_Oh, so you’ve thought about it, huh?_

_-How can I not? What with you pining over him an all._

_I can’t help if I think he’s hot. That’s not weird for you, is it? You feel everything I feel, right?_

_-I’ll admit, it was new for me. My last host didn’t hold feelings towards much of anyone really. But, it’s not uncommon for a Tok’ra in a male host to mate with a Tok’ra in another male host._

_Not uncommon? I don’t see any gay couples here._

_-True. I guess some might think like you do and choose to hide their true nature, thus causing them to not seek out a mate._

_Or, is it because the Tok’ra don’t outwardly say, “it’s okay to be gay”?_

_-Well, we’ve never said it, but we would never hate one of our own._

_That sounds more like tolerance than acceptance to me._

_-I-I’ve never thought of it that way. You earthlings sure have a different way of seeing things._

_Yeah, well, we’ve been through a lot of shit. Gives us perspective. So many people saying different things, it’s important to know what you believe._

_-I see your point. The Tok’ra have only ever been amongst other Tok’ra, who feel the same, so without any other perspective, we seem to have become single minded, lacking complexity in our beliefs. I see now, this is what has been bothering you. My tolerance doesn’t naturally mean support, does it?_

_I don’t blame you, Mashak. I know the what the Tok’ra needed to be in order to survive. It was brave, and I’m glad they can now be who they want to be._

_-Yes, I am glad too. You have influenced me, Oliver, in many ways it seems. And I’m afraid that means some of your more subversive and direct attitudes have caused me to indeed been scheming against you._

_I fucking knew it!_

+++

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter! Yay!
> 
> Lot's of dialogue in this one, not sure how it went. Let me know?
> 
> Disclaimer: I have never been in the military, and was just assuming things. Feel free to let me know if I said anything that wasn't true.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! I hope you liked it and all. Any comments would be appreciated about what you liked, didn't like, etc.
> 
> I don't really have a full outline of where the story is going to go or how long it will be. I'm writing this chapter by chapter and posting it once I'm done with one. So, that means updates will be either really quick or really long, depending on how often I am writing.
> 
> But, anywho, thanks again for reading!


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